Its life ‘Jim’; but not as we know it
Ok first up, before I get into the content. Did you know that this was never actually said in the film just by the ‘The Firm’ in the Star Trekkin song? Me either!
I’m not a ‘Trekky’ so to be fair I wasn’t really sure where this came from but whenever I talk about change, and in particular personal change this phrase often comes to mind, so I had to Google it to find out a little more and that’s when I found out that the phrase is actually a misquote!
Who knew?!
What he really said: "No life as we know it."
Same meaning albeit slightly different! When you think about personal change it is the unknown that causes the fear.
It is the unknown ahead of us that makes us feel uncomfortable. It is the unknown way of life, what life looks like ahead. No ‘life as we know it’ – we don’t know, and we don’t like not knowing.
So; this is where I am at the moment. My personal life ‘as I know it’ is about to change, significantly!
Other parents may relate. My baby boy is leaving home! I am going from single parent to a completely empty nest!
I really don’t know what life is going to look and feel like. As of this weekend there will not be a ‘life as I know it’
And I am torn.
On the one hand this is an incredible opportunity for him. A college placement where I know he will grow and develop and will be in the best place to be the best version of himself ready for the next step on his life journey.
On the other hand, my life will continue, but with a huge void. It will be life but not as I know it!
We both have a big change, but we are looking at it very differently.
He sees opportunity, time to focus on his personal growth, a new environment to step outside of his comfort zone. It is all a positive excitement.
I see a gap, far too much peace and quiet and food in my fridge!
I am however also trying to see it in the same way. Opportunity, time to focus on my personal growth, a change of environment to step outside of my comfort zone. Positive excitement is a bit of a stretch at the moment, but a positive approach is a good start!
What change are you moving through at the moment?
Are you moving through it or are you ping ponging back and forth in the change curve?
What Direction are you moving in?
Are you moving forward? To move through and transition through the change you have to make small and consistent movements forward, focus on what the new life looks like, identify the positives and find ways to move towards it.
Go with the flow
Not all the transition will be in your control. The change may be happening ‘to you’ but the sooner you can accept the change and identify the elements that are in your control the easier it is to focus on that. Don’t fight the elements that you cannot control.
Where is your focus?
What are you focusing on? Are you looking back at the ‘life as you know it’? or are you focusing ahead on identifying what your new life looks like and trying to find the positives. Are you looking forward to how you can shape the new life ahead of you?
What is the emotion and is it useful?
Change is an emotional process. It is hard, probably impossible, to transition through a period of change without any emotion at all. What is helpful, is to check where you are through the change curve and take time to reflect on the emotions you feel. Are the emotions useful to you in helping you transition through to the positive acceptance of the change?
Where are the opportunities?
Whatever the change, whether it is a change you have instigated or a change that is happening to you don’t close yourself to opportunities. Be open to the possibilities that are coming with the change. Look for the positives. Look for the opportunities. Chances are you will find what you are looking for, just make sure that you are looking for the right things for you, and your future ‘life as you know it’.
***
Do you need support working through a transition of change?
Join one of the Phoenix Webinars to learn tools, skills and strategies to help you bring balance.
What questions do you have?